SCREGMAN SAYS...

THIS IS MY GAME... SUCKING THE MARROW FROM THE BONES OF LIFE... ONE BONE AT A TIME...

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

LET'S GET PHYSICAL [PART THE FIRST]


I had the first part of my physical on Tuesday, August 1, 2006. For some reason, I thought it would involve the undressing, the poking, the prodding, perhaps a little ball grabbing and quite possibly some anal penetration [EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW!!!] BUT, I guess a little discomfort is necessary. Obviously, I'd want to know if there's something festering... growing... in my insides that shouldn't be there.

Before my appointment, I had received a questionnaire in the mail that inquired about my eating habits, drinking habits, smoking habits, family medical history, etc. I completed the forms and submitted them when I checked in.

They took my height and weight. They drew blood. They had me blow 3x into a contraption that measured my lung capacity. They had me read an eye chart. It was all really quick.

Then I received a confidential letter in the mail with their findings...

Would you believe I'm overweight? The following is verbatim from the letter: You are 64 inches (5 feet 4 inches) tall. A healthy weight range for this height is 124 - 143 pounds. At 149 pounds, you are above the healthy weight range for your height. Even being mildy overweight increases the likelihood of developing other risk factors, especially high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and diabetes. Permanent weight loss will result from combining increased physical activity (long distance walking is excellent) with behavior changes in terms of food selection and preparation. This is different from "going on a diet".

The fact that I've never smoked was a plus.

The Vital Capacity (how much air my lungs can hold) and FEV1 (how fast I can move it) were lower than normal. In essence, my lungs are one year older than they should be. If I could get my VC to normal, I could improve my Health Age by 1.0 years. Hrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmm... This may also explain why my stamina sucks when I'm in capoeira. I'll bet when I was a runner, my lungs were much better.

My blood pressure is better than average: 115 systolic; 72 diastolic (115/72).

Resting pulse rate was 60 heartbeats per minute, which is desirable.

Total blood cholesterol level is 247mg, which is elevated. Damn... I hate the idea of giving up chicken skin, of giving up bacon, of giving up pork fat, of having to eat white meat instead of dark meat...

Blood sugar level is 89 mg, which is normal.

Overall, the letter stated: Your Health Age is that of a healthy, low risk 36 year old man. Good though this is, there is still further benefit you can obtain. You could improve your Health Age to 34 years old.

Now, when I first made the decision to have a full physical, I thought I'd change my eating habits and exercise habits about a month or two before the first appointment; just to try to get better scores. But then, I also wanted an honest assessment of my health... So I decided not to alter anything. I'll make any necessary changes after my follow-up.

My second appointment, the big appointment, is Wed, August 23.

WHITE RICE RULES!!! BROWN RICE... ARRRRRRRRRGH!!


7 Comments:

  • At 9:16 PM, August 15, 2006, Blogger caninecologne said…

    I wish you luck in your dietary changes...sincerely. You could have red meat once in a while, but moderation is the key right?

    That was a pretty thorough run down of your physical. Everything sounds okay. I think that your weight doesn't take into account that you have muscle mass. You're not like some fat-ass that does nothing.

    By the way, did you want ball-grabbing and anal probing? "Turn to the left and cough"...Wait a minute, why are BOTH of the doctor's hands on my shoulders? AAAAH

     
  • At 11:33 PM, August 15, 2006, Blogger mikshir said…

    OMG, i just had a quasi-physical with my new PCP (primary care physician). i was worried i'd have the male finger in the anular region treatment but no such "luck". anyhow i got the same weight chart speech. i am NOT overweight. I am OBESE. according to this chart that is. ah, that makes me feel better. however, MY doc, at least tried to be sensitive and insist that the chart is very HARSH, especially to men. but i think the whole thing is shock. they want to scare you into conformity. and i buy it. though i'm doing nothing about it.

     
  • At 11:31 AM, August 16, 2006, Blogger caninecologne said…

    ronin,
    how does one go about improving his/her VC (lungs?)

    thane,
    anular = new word? i like it.

     
  • At 11:51 AM, August 16, 2006, Blogger HotFudge said…

    Based upon your health appraisal report sounds like your on the right track babycake. Keep up the good work!

     
  • At 8:52 AM, August 17, 2006, Blogger bert wolfe said…

    Dude, at least your assessment said you were the right age. My assessment 2 years ago had me at a healthy 36 year old. I'm currently 36, so that sucked.

    Yeah, you gotta curb the red meat to get that cholesterol level down a bit. Canine has been great in giving me breasts (chicken, that is), salmon, and veggies. I still have meat once in a while, but not as frequently.

    About 3 months ago my cholesterol was 242. Since then I've been eating oatmeal with cinnamon for breakfast almost daily. I've got another check scheduled in about 3 months so I'd like to see an improvement.

     
  • At 6:34 PM, August 17, 2006, Blogger Mulysa said…

    i was going to go on this ramble about FEV 1 and lungs and all that, but didn't want to be indirectly responsible for anyone getting injured from their head falling into the keyboard because they fell asleep reading my comment...

     
  • At 10:24 PM, August 17, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Ah Ronin, weight is not the most important factor. It's the quick and dirty measure but muscle mass could be throwing off your readings. Imagine what a buffed out trainer would be told.

    The CDC warns that BMI is not completely reliable for people with high msucle mass.

    Besides, even having large amounts of fat is not necessarily a measure of health. Dr Kenneth Cooper in Texas has done extensive research that shows that levels of fitness not fatness is ore important in predicted health outcomes.

    Shogun's doctors were always suprised by his aerobic capacity, cholesterol levels, all his blood profiles when he was chubby. We used to joke that he was the healthiest fat guy we knew.

    But, perhaps cutting bak a bit on the saturated animals fats might not be a bad idea. That shit will kill you.

     

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