SOME BUTTER ON THESE ROLLS

[This blog was inspired by Shogun's blog on exercise...]

Everytime ScregMan squats, his cel phone (which he wears on his belt) pops off. It seems there's this roll of fat on his stomach/waist that bunches up just enough to pop his phone off its clip. And for the really curious, he squats when he's putting his shoes on, when he's turning off (or on) the power strip underneath his desk at work, or when he's picking something up (bend at the knees, not at the waste, unless you want to hurt your back). So it's not like his phone pops off every 5 minutes. Nonetheless, the weight he's gained over the years has slowly crept up and onto him and is really making itself known.

The general concensus among those who've known ScregMan for years seems to be that he was really skinny... And yes, when he looks at pictures of himself from long ago, he was SKINNY. His supervisor used to call him "toothpick". Years ago, ScregMan could really eat. Back then, he could really pack the food away. [Possible topic for another blog: Being a "Rambler". The "traditional" meal for a Rambler after a night of rambling was a Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger, large fries, and large drink from Carl's Jr. -OR- a carne asada burrito, 3-5 rolled tacos, and a large drink from any 24 hr Mexican food place. ScregMan just can't do the Double Western anymore...] BUT... ScregMan was also warned that someday, somehow, somewhere, his metabolism would slow down.

HotFudge says ScregMan looks healthier now that he's gained weight. The ironic thing, though, is he thinks he was actually healthier when he was skinnier. He was more active AND he kind of watched what he ate, even though he ate a lot of it. He remembers his cholesterol being very low years ago. It's probably skyrocketed since then. So, ScregMan "looks" healthier, but in actuality, he's less healthy than before. Does that make any sense?

The weight gain has been only partially good in terms of clothing. Way back, it was extremely hard for ScregMan to shop in the "Men's" section of a department store. Everything was just too big for him, forcing him to shop in the "Boy's" section. [Any pride he may have shown at shopping in the boy's section was just a smoke-screen. He hated it.] Now, he shops in the mens' sections with the other men. [Ooooohhhh... He feels soooooo privileged. He's finally what society would consider, the size of a man.] Over the years, ScregMan watched (not literally) his waist go from a 28 to its current 36.[Also, that's a 36 with some space. He always buys pants with some space for growing.] Mind you, this happened over (hmmmmmmmmmmm) 5-6 years, not overnight. But still, it's a little disheartening. It's such a waste to have to buy new clothes cuz you've outgrown (or are outgrowing) your current wardrobe. And he absolutely hates shopping for clothes. The whole "trying on clothes to see if they fit" makes ScregMan want to scream. HotFudge will attest to this. ScregMan LOATHES shopping for clothes. He gets crabby and cranky and very impatient very easily. And what about a size 15 shirt that's perfect at this store, but just a tad too big at that store, and a tad too small at another? What's that all about? Why aren't the damned sizes truly universal? AAAARRRGGGHHH!!

So, as the old year draws to a close and the new year approaches, ScregMan will make a valiant effort to gain control of his gut. It seems that it's not sit-ups or crunches that'll do it, but aerobics (and healthy eating, of course). He will do sit-ups and crunches, too, but it's really the aerobics he'll concentrate on.

Is it possible to have the traditional "washboard" stomach, but covered by a gut?